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Martha Quits
Martha Stewart has decided to resign as director and chief creative officer of Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia but will retain the role of "founding editorial director". She decided against the original title proposed by employees of the company, "founding bitch".

Officers of Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia said they have found a suitable replacement for Martha as director of the company and hope to have him in place as soon as he is free from his present post. In a related story, Satan has resigned his position in Hell.



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